One of the titles I’d been convinced to start reading as a result of DC’s New 52 was Catwoman. Since, prior to the reboot, the only DC character I could take seriously was Batman, it wasn’t too hard of a feat to convince me to read a comic starring one of his biggest villainous romantic interests. Plus, I figured it wouldn’t be your typical superhero comic, as it’s all about a woman who robs people blind. She’s a cat burglar, so her nemeses are actually going to be relatively heroic. The idea of reversing the role of the lead character from hero to villain intrigued me. It worked for Dr. Horrible’s Singalong Blog. It had to work for one of the most popular characters in Batman’s rogue gallery.
"I don't even care that there's police below me. I'm taking my mask off and making it rain stolen diamonds. Who says that's a bad idea?"
Alas, it’s just not meant to be. Four issues in, and I just want to slap Selina Kyle in the mouth a thousand times for being so stupid, whiney, and slutty. She’s not a particularly good burglar, because she just keeps getting caught. She gets her BFF and fence killed (because she keeps getting caught). And every time she encounters Batman/Bruce Wayne, she gets all twitterpated and has to be on him. All up on him.
Weirdly, Penguin never greets Batman like this.
Who is Catwoman? So far, she’s just some weak woman who needs people to take care of her. She’s too wrapped up in her chase for jewels (the glittery kind and the family kind) to make any kind of rational decision and, as such, bad things just keep happening to her. She encounters former woman-bashers which make her go crazy and eye-scratchy, the mob finds out where she’s hiding out TWICE and run her out of house and home, she goes to the funeral of her dead friend and meets up with a former accomplice who can probably help her out if she would just be smart but, of course, she can’t be smart and gets attacked by what’s either a super hero or another mob enforcer…
It’s just tiring and kind of stupid. I get that maybe you can’t portray crime in a glamorous way but even the most determined thief is probably going to re-think her career path if in the span of what seems to be about two or three weeks she’s been kicked around as much as Catwoman has.
Don't quit your day job as pinch hitter for the Gotham Bats.
I’m going to stick around and see what Catwoman does with this new element. My bet is that she asks Batman for help. And by ask, I mean totally have sex with him. Because that’s how New 52 Catwoman rolls.
